I’m 21 years outdated and graduating school in 2 weeks. I’ve been dating a man I met at school for 2 years now. He is truthfully my finest pal and we do have a variety of enjoyable collectively. Our relationship has began to grow to be very routine and we hardly ever ever had intercourse. I wound up breaking apart with him a number of months in the past and he took the information EXTREMELY arduous. He cried a lot about it and made me really feel just like the worst individual ever. He guilt tripped me on a regular basis and questioned “Why would you do this to me? I don’t deserve this!” After questioning me on a regular basis and telling me he would change I made a decision to take him again. Things had been going nice and I used to be beginning to really feel nice once more. But now, issues are beginning to flip again into the identical outdated factor. Sex is totally awkward between us and I haven’t had the will to have intercourse with him and he doesn’t perceive why. I’m transferring again residence to my dad and mom home and he questions me continuously “Your not going to break up with me are you? Do you REALLY love me?”
I really feel like the person in this relationship as a result of is SO delicate to every little thing. I can’t deal with the stress from him and I’m beginning to really feel trapped. But I’m deathly afraid to breakup with him once more as a result of I’m scared he’s going to unfastened it. Please assist me, I do know this sounds so infantile however I’ve resorted to asking recommendation as a result of I’m so confused.
Let me start by saying that asking for steerage in this manner just isn’t infantile.
Your boyfriend sounds very susceptible and insecure, as demonstrated by his reactions if you’ve tried to interrupt up with him. The desperation is regarding. Insecurity resembling this could stem from prior insecure relationships or sense of self however finally, it may be problematic for intimate relationships. It cannot solely harm the relationship however displays a scared, pained, susceptible particular person. Clingy habits can depart the opposite individual feeling trapped. The irony is that usually the individual’s desperation NOT to lose the opposite could cause simply that. It can grow to be a self-fulfilling prophecy.
You have the appropriate to be with the one who appears like a superb match – not be pressured to stick with somebody out of concern of their response for those who depart. That being stated, if his habits turns into scary otherwise you’re afraid for him (potential for self-harm, suicide, and so forth), get his family and friends concerned as a help community. If he threatens to hurt himself and has a plan and means to do it, name 911.
Need recommendation? Consider a Relationship Consultation for steerage.